Spider-Man, Spider-Man, who should play the Spider-Man...?

I have always enjoyed the Spider-Man movies. They are good entertainment with witty(-ish) humour. I even kind of liked the third one. Kind of. They are now rebooting the franchise, so it's bye bye Sam Raimi, Tobey Maguire and co. I think this is a good decision, the movies and characters were getting a little... tired. And since they want to keep doing movies about Spider-Man, better bring some fresh blood in and hope the audience is still interested in Spidey's adventures. (Though they might be having a hard time making it interesting enough and different from the previous origin story... which was made less than ten years ago...)

Apparently, Marc Webb is directing (with a surname like that, does he have an option?) and the battle over the role of Peter Parker has narrowed down to a handful of young, brisk gentlemen. This is me listing the candidates' pros and cons and telling them who they should cast because I know best giving my humble opinion about who I would give the part to.

Aaron Johnson

+ He's hot, alright.

+ He showed us in Kick-Ass he can both kick ass and get his ass kicked.

+ He also proved that he can look very nerdy and fake-unattractive if he wants to.

+ But he can also start blossoming, so to speak, when it's time to go all action hero and look good.

- He'd be kind of the obvious choice, wouldn't he?

- He's already Kick-Ass. Does he have to get to be Spider-Man, too?

- If he is cast as Spider-Man, he might not have the time to do more Kick-Ass films. I want more and more Kick-Ass films.

- If he's both Spider-Man and Kick-Ass, he might have to parodise himself in Kick-Ass.

+ Which, on second thought, could be quite cool.

Alden Ehrenreich

- He has a difficult name. They would misspell it in the movie posters, or something.

+ He's an unknown face, which could be nice. Tobey was fairly unknow when he first pulled the leotard on.

+/- I've never seen him before, so I have no idea about this quy's talents.

- He looks a bit old compared to the other candidates. Wouldn't buy him as a teenager.

Andrew Garfield

+ He's adorable.

+ He sure as hell has the talent to do anything he's asked.

- I'd start crying in the middle of a Spider-Man movie, because he reminds me of Boy A.

+ He's a Brit. I'd like a British Spider-Man.

+ Imaginarium proved he looks good in funny costumes, surrounded by CGI.

- I'd rather see him do drama than a brainless superhero movie. He might be too talented for the part.

Anton Yelchin

+ Though I have seen him only in Charlie Bartlett, I liked him a lot in that one.

- Is he too skinny?

+ Nah, there are a lot of gyms in the world.

+ There's a certain kind of Spidey vibe in him.

- He'd have no problems with the comedy part of the role.

Frank Dillane

- He is Voldemort. Voldemort is the most evil thing on Earth.

- I didn't like him as Voldemort. The actor in The Chamber of Secrets was a lot better. This guy was slimy and still kind of tame.

- I don't get the Spidey vibe.

- He doesn't look geeky enough.

- In this picture he looks a bit like James Franco - who of course played Peter's best friend in the trilogy. That might indeed be a better role for him...?

- There seems to be everything wrong with this guy. Sorry. No chance.

+ Because I don't like him, he will surely be cast as Spider-Man.

Jamie Bell

+ He danced his way into my heart as Billy Elliot.

+ So I kind of love him.

+ I liked him a lot in King Kong, too.

+ This could be his chance to shine, to get the symphaties of the big audiences and maybe to get more visible roles in more movies.

+ He's so very cute.

+ He's short of geeky and shy, but I could totally see him transform into a badass superhero.

- I so very much want to see him dance again. Spider-Man might not be the best role for that purpose.

+ On second thought, there was that notorious dance scene in the third movie...

Logan Lerman

+ Sure looks like a teenager.

- Apparently that Percy Jakcson film he was in was kind of bad.

- Oh I don't know. I've never seen him in anything.

-/+ I could totally see the teenage girls go crazy for him. Could turn annoying.

Michael Angerano

+ I remember him being quite sweet in Lords of Dogtown.

+ Looks like an unpopular geek with a heart of gold.

- Should go to gym.

- I just kind of can't see him putting on that costume and looking cool.

+ He's feels like kind of an underdog.

+ I like underdogs.

VERDICT: Jamie Bell should play Peter Parker/Spider-Man. Because I only want good things for that guy and a role in a major franchise might do him a lot of good.

BUT: I suppose they'll be very boring and obvious and cast Aaron Johnson. Because he's so hot right now. And well, I wouldn't mind. (Eye candy is always welcome.) But I just enjoy surprises. I almost hope they cast Voldemort.

Well, they are expected to make the choice very soon. I can only hope they haven't done it while I've been writing this post, so that after I publish this and go to IMDb I spot a news title: Frank Dillane is the new Spider-Man! That would be lame and not only because of the bad choice.