Anna Karenina (2012) / appreciation for Aaron Taylor-Johnson's mustache

"You can't ask why about love."

I'm being very honest with the title there. I really am not going to talk about the movie Anna Karenina that much. I'm just mostly going to talk about Aaron Taylor-Johnson's mustache. I wish I was kidding.

Anna Karenina was very much what I expected it to be. It was quite pleasant to watch, not just because of the certain mustache, but also because of the beautiful sets and the cinematography and the costumes. Joe Wright has directed many films that I have enjoyed watching, first and foremost Atonement, which is one of my favorite films of all time, and which also made me fall irrevocably in love with James McAvoy. And which I haven't seen in a few years, actually! Gee, I need to fix that. And see if it's still favorite material.

I am one of those people who have always liked Keira Knightley. Admittedly, most of my positive sentiments for her derive from Atonement (and that gorgeous green dress!), but I've enjoyed her other performances, too. If nothing else, she can definitely pull of a sophisticated, 18th/19th century aristocrat lady.  By the way, the make-up department should get an Oscar for making Jude Law look so unattractive. That takes some skill, yo!

I find it amusing that Matthew Macfayden has been demoted from being Keira Knightley's love interest to being her brother. Ouch! The years have not been as kind to Mr. Darcy as they have been to Elizabeth Bennet. (Macfayden is eleven years Knightley's senior, though, so it's only fair that he retires from romantic leading roles earlier than her.) I liked his character, though. Comic relief is always likable.

The film was a tad too long, and at times felt very aimless. I'm not sure about the necessity of some of the subplots. Like I'm not sure whether I liked the way they used the stage as a device in telling the story. It felt strange, and confusing in the beginning.

The romance of Anna Karenina and Count Vronsky is the heart of the story, so I guess it is the thing that has to be blamed for the film leaving my mind un-blown. I mean, of course I find the premise completely believable: Bring me Aaron Taylor-Johnson wearing that mustache and the hair and the uniform, and have him shoot a few of those seductive glances at me, and I'll leave my imaginary husband before you can say, "It's ironic that Jude Law plays the decent, saint-like husband who gets cheated on by his wife who falls for someone young and good-looking".

Anyway. What I most enjoyed about the film was the beginning: when they brought in Aaron T-J (damn you, dude, for getting married and changing your last name into something so long and troublesome to type) and painted the picture about what a charmer and a heart-breaker he is, and then had him and Keira exchange some of those lingering looks loaded with sexual tension, and showed him kissing hands in intense and intimate close-ups. Ooooh. Yeah, after that no member of the audience can blame Anna Karenina for ruining her life for this young hunk of a man.

Let's review:

The best things about Anna Karenina, pt. 1: The smoking hot glances full of pure sex and seduction.

The best things about Anna Karenina, pt. 2: The super hot close-ups of kissing of hands.

Unfortunately, after the hand-kissing and the sex-glancing have worked their magic, and Anna and Vronsky fall in love so swiftly and randomly during one dance that you think you're watching a Disney animation, my interest and hopes for the film drop significantly, not to to be raised again.

Not even letting us witness the two of them kissing, more passionately and more up close than any of us in the audience feel comfortable watching, could revive the excited feelings I felt in the beginning. Because, in the end, I felt we didn't get to see enough layers in the characters. We see they are both very attractive, but we don't really get why that attraction turned into love. But, well, you can't ask why about love, you know. Still, I wanted to go a little deeper. I didn't end up caring about the characters too much.

What I did care about, however, was Aaron Taylor-Johnson's mustache. It's weird. One should not look good in a mustache. Who really wears a mustache? Except for Charlie Chaplin and Hitler, and only one of them looks good wearing it. A mustache and a head full of fake blond curls is not the easiest combination to rock, especially if you are obligated to charm all of Earth's female population while doing it. So, two thumbs up for Aaron T-J for showing that mustache can be the new sexy. We can only hope he'll adapt that look to the Kick-Ass sequel, too. Really, honestly, seriously: Not many young men could pull of that look.

The best things about Anna Karenina, pt. 3: The mustache.

I went to see Anna Karenina in the cinema of my childhood and teenage years, which was so nice, because it had been ages since the last time I went there. The audience consisted mostly of high school kids, who had come to see the film as a class assignment. Me and and my friend felt old, and oddly envious of the lucky 16-year-olds, for having such simple lives, and just hanging out at school, only dreaming about their future, instead of having to live it. Anyway, the teenagers giggled at certain parts that made them feel uncomfortable, and that made me feel uncomfortable. At times I didn't have an idea why they were bursting out laughing. Oh well. Perhaps you can't ask why about unintentional comedy, either.

Then I came to think that had they made the Star Wars prequels ten years later, Aaron Johnson (or Taylor-Johnson, whatever) could have been the perfect Anakin Skywalker that Hayden Christensen was never quite able to be. He actually might have made some of the awkward romance scenes work, too, with a few of those Glances of Seduction. Might have. Just something I hope to have a detailed, vivid, lengthy dream about tonight.

Hmm.

I start writing these things, thinking I have hardly anything to say, because the film didn't have much of an impact on me, but then I end up writing a post, comparable to a Tolstoy classic in length. Oh, the power of a good mustache. I'll finish by quoting the actual novel, and maybe thus fool you into thinking that this has been a very intelligent and sophisticated post, indeed.

He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun, yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking.

~ Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (2011) / the return of the Bromance

 

directed by Guy Richie / starring Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law, Noomi Rapace, Jared Harris, Stephen Fry

I loved the first Sherlock Holmes so much. I actually went to see it in cinema three times. That was the first time I'd seen a film in cinema three times since Revenge of the Sith, by the way, and it hasn't happened again since. I started to look forward to the next Holmes adventure right after the wonderful ending of the first film, quite obviously promising for more. Then at some point I got tired of waiting and allowed myself to restrain my enormous enthusiasm towards the upcoming sequel. In other words, I didn't care too much about the franchise anymore. Not even the trailer could arouse my interest very much. It looked a bit lame and predictable and uninventive. Like the sequel would just rely on the jokes and ideas and success of the first film.

And it kind of did, to a certain lenght, of course. But it wasn't a bad thing at all, they did it well, actully! The old gags were continued and the distinct slo-mo action sequences were there again, but there was some clever reinvention going on, which made it surprisingly fresh, and hardly repetitive at all. Oh, and boy, did the Bromance bloom.

In case someone (like me, it turns out) has forgotten that Robert Downey Jr. is the sexiest man alive, let me just point this out: Robert Downey Jr. is, indeed, the sexiest man alive. Oh, mama. No one plays that absurdly cocky yet indeniably lovable type of character better than him. Can't wait for Avengers and the next Iron Man. Boy, oh boy. There might be a sex overload.

Scandinavia's pride Noomi Rapace was a real joy! Yes, I've decided to take pride on her, too, I won't let Sweden take all the credit. Because I'm sick of Sweden winning all the time. Also, since this fall (or autumn or whatever, I don't know what English I should use now that I'm back home) Sweden often functioned as a substitute for curing homesickness, I now kind of look at Scandinavia as a whole, so calling Rapace "our girl" would be more than appropriate. Let her conquer the world and bring fame to her home country, Scandinavia! Ahem.

Jared Harris was great, really great! There's something oddly gentle about his eyes, yet they can turn ice-cold and deliver a deadly stare. I love villains that aren't obviously evil (though I do love some obviously evil villains, too), and who destroy the world without losing that indifferent, almost friendly poker face. Really great job, you Mad Man!

Like in the first film, I again enjoyed the brilliant music, the cool end credits, the cinematography of the action scenes (even in the scene in the forrest when it ALMOST (?) went over-the-top), the fun supporting characters and the wonderful and hilarious chemistry between Law and Downey Jr.

In summary, I'd say that Game of Shadows was a very good sequel. The ending was excellent. Unpredictable. The end came too soon. Or was it really that? The end? If not, I sure am ready for more, so bring it.
 

"What do you see?"

"Everything."

Sherlock makes a kaboom boom boom comeback

I hugely enjoyed the first Sherlock Holmes, and have been looking forward to this sequal for ages. Admitted, recently I've kind of forgotten to look forward to it, but was altogether glad to find that the first trailer has come out.

Not sure what to think about it, though. There was a lot of kaboom boom boom. Too much, even, I hope there's something else too in the actual movie... Noomi Rapace is a huge plus, great to see her make her big break in a huge Hollywood film! The brilliant chemistry of RDJ and Jude Law made the first film such a joy, and I can only hope the charm is still there in the sequel.

I'm not blown away by the trailer, nor am I feeling as super excited as I expected myself to, but still, the movie should be good solid entertainment, if not anything else. I clearly need to start re-warming up my love for RDJ, though...

A Christmas Tradition vol. 2: The Holiday

Although The Holiday's status as a Christmas film (or as a film in general) doesn't quite reach the level of Love Actually in my book, it is still a wonderful mix of romance and that lovely christmassy atmosphere. Thus there must be no December without The Holiday!

(I guess this'll be on TV today. Shame I'll be at work, it would've been nice to watch it with all the five trillion commericial breaks... not.)

Kate Winslet is as lovely as ever as the heartbroken Iris. I've never been the biggest fan of the comedy of Jack Black, but he's quite sweet and likable and to prove that he's funny too, I've linked one of my favourites scenes below. Cameron Diaz is a bit plastic and stuck doing similar roles, but I don't really mind her. And Jude Law, well, he's always a pleasure to look at. Arthur played by Eli Wallach is my absolute favourite character. The old man rocks!

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to kiss you twice... and then linger a long time on the second kiss."

"Call me old fashioned, but I don't believe it to be appropriate to have sex with a woman who is unconcious."

"Miles. You really are an incredibly decent man."

"I know. It's always been my problem."

"Iris, in the movies, we have leading ladies and we have the best friend. You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason, you're behaving like the best friend."

"What exactly has got into you?"
"I don't know. But I think what I've got is something slightly resembling... gumption!"

"I'm looking for corny in my life."

Plus this awesome scene that also includes the awesome cameo by Dustin Hoffman...

"Can't go anywhere..."

Two traditions down, three to go! I've already started with the third one, it's a book.

P.S. My Lost marathon is only the finale away from being complete. Yay! I also finally went to see Rare Exports and it was very good. It's funny how you suddenly get things done when you are too pissed off to do any school work...

My TOP 5 favourite male bonds in movies

Well, the title says it all, doesn't it? Here's a list of my favourite male twosomes (platonic bonds only)! Please, feel free to protest.

5. Gay Perry & Harry (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, 2005)

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is quite a hilarious movie. And most of the comedy emerges from the interaction between the characters of Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer. RDJ's small-time crook Harry babbles away in a pace that is quite a challenge to keep up with and Kilmer's bad ass gay detective Gay Perry rolls his eyes and tells Harry to shut the fuck up, you fucking idiot. For a little taste of that excellent team work, see the 'eight percent chance' scene, and the film's gag reel, too, because those two just crack me up.

"Look up "idiot" in the dictionary. You know what you'll find?"
"A picture of me?"
"No! The definition of the word idiot, which you fucking are!"

4. Gordie & Chris (Stand by Me, 1986)

These two might no crack me up much, but they certainly do melt my heart and make me wish I was a 12-year-old boy. (And just to be clear, that doesn't happen too often. (I mean the latter.)) Gordie and Chris, played by Wil Wheaton and River Phoenix, are so good buddies in such a profound and mature way that all you can do is envy them... and then melt away. So, whether it's about messing around with big boys' toys or opening up about your sorrows, they can always count on each other. As long as they are twelve, at least... Growing up sucks.

"I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?"

3. Holmes & Watson (Sherlock Holmes, 2009)

(Another RDJ, sorry.) Once I heard someone say that if RDJ had as good a chemistry with Rachel McAdams as he has with Jude Law, the film would've worked so much better. Haha, can't argue that. Holmes and Watson know each other very well, too well, even, and they constantly piss each other off, but still can fully rely on the other in a tough spot. And yeah, there's that slightly homoerotic vibe. That old-married-couple-ness is so much fun, really.

"You've never complained about my methods before."
"I'm not complaining. How am I complaining? When have do I ever complain about you practicing the violin at three in the morning, or your mess, your general lack of hygiene, or the fact that you steal my clothes?"

2. Merry & Pippin (The Lord of the Rings, 2001, 2002, 2003)

Of all the amazing friendships The Lord of the Rings has to offer, I chose this twosome without hesitation. Why? Because they have been friends like forever. Because they will be friends forever. Because if you separate them, they are just two lonely and lost and miserable halves. Because they are goofy and cute and adorable. Because Dominic Monaghan and Billy Boyd just click, and it shows. Because they appreciate the value of second breakfast. Okay?
 

"Are we lost?"

"No."

"I think we are."

"Shh. Gandalf's thinking."
"Merry?"

"What?"
"I'm hungry."

1. Anakin & Obi-Wan (Star Wars, 1999, 2002, 2005)

They shouldn't be number one. I mean, the way they potray this friendship in the films, and the way Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen act it, isn't always winner material. However, behind the occasional new-generation Star Wars horridness, there is a great and powerful story about a long, deep, strong bond that breaks apart under world-shattering circumstances. So that makes Anakin and Obi-Wan worth this ranking. (PS. Don't get me wrong, I like the prequels. Even I and II, kind of.)

"You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you."

HONOURABLE MENTIONS

Consolation prizes go to Woody & Buzz from Toy Story (1995, 1999, 2010) and Gerry/Daphne & Joe/Josephine from Some Like It Hot (1959). Sorry guys, you didn't quite make it. It was close, alright. I finalized the list before Toy Story 3, and afterwards I thought about cheating and making it a TOP 6, but I didn't. Maybe I should've. Still, Woody and Buzz are great (Woody and Andy, too!). And none of these guys would look so good on a dress as Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis did! Ewan McGregor, maybe? Anyway.

So... Who did I forget?

My TOP 5 favourite (nice) robots

Yesterday's Moon rewatch inspired me to do this list. These are five of my favourite robots! ... This was actually an easy one, mostly because I wouldn't call myself a sci-fi expert, and these five were pretty much the only likable ones I came up with. I didn't want Schwarzenegger on my list - with all due respect of course, Mr Governor! I'm not very much into ruthless killing machines, so I'll leave Optimus Prime and co. out of my list, too. Call me a sissy, but I like my robots nice and sympathetic! Or just handsome.

5. Gigolo Joe (Artificial Intelligence: AI)

I admit, it's been a while since I saw Spielberg's futuristic sci-fi fairytale, but as it popped into my mind when making this list, I began to plan a rewatch. I was quite young when I saw AI, and it'd be interesting to see how I like it now. Jude Law's Gigolo Joe looks like Barbie's Ken in the picture indeed is what the name suggests: a lover robot. I wanted to include him on my list, because he is handsome there is something very tragic about this film and yet it is fascinating and same goes with the character. I think the quotes summarize it better that I can say:

"We are the guiltless pleasures of the lonely human being. You won't get us pregnant or have us to supper with mommy and daddy. We work under you, we work on you and we work for you. Man made us better at what we do than was ever humanly possible."

"They hate us, you know... The humans. They'll stop at nothing."

4. Marvin (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

Marvin is very depressed. He's stuck with a bunch of idiots, and he can't put his enormous brain into action. There is really nothing that could cheer him up. After all, he's programmed to be depressed, the poor robot! Voiced by the wonderfully smooth Alan Rickman in the 2005 version of Douglas Adams' hilarious sci-fi adventure novel, he is the bright spot (no pun intended) of the otherwise mediocre interpretation. (Yeah, it has a good cast - including Sam Rockwell - but still. Nah.) Marvin is unintentionally hilarious, sarcastic and melodramatic, and Alan Rickman is just great... Who knew depression can be so much fun?

"I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed."
"Well, we have something that may take your mind off it."
"It won't work, I have an exceptionally large mind."

"I've been talking to the ship's computer."
"And?"
"It hates me."


"Life? Don't talk to me about life!"

3. GERTY (Moon)

GERTY is the only one keeping company to Sam Rockwell in his one man show Moon. GERTY is programmed to help and take care of Sam and that's what he does, whatever it takes. What I like about GERTY the most is Kevin Spacey's soothing voice and the smiley face icons.

"I'm here to keep you safe, Sam. I want to help you."

"Sam, get some sleep. You're very tired."

2. Wall-E (Wall-E)

Wall-E isn't just a sidekick, a supporting character or a comic relief. He's the star of his own (fantastic!) film. Disney/Pixar's animators have really done a great job creating this little robot - he doesn't talk much, but we know how he's feeling, all the time.Wall-E is disarmingly cute and adorable, in a way that no machine has even been before or after. An honorable mention to his badass love interest EVE (when has love between artificial things ever been so real?) and MO, who's just funny ("Foreign contaminent. Foreign contaminent.").

"EEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEE!"

1. R2-D2 & C-3PO (Star Wars)

"I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations. And this is my counterpart R2-D2." This is a legendary pair and the only option for number one. They work best together, so I didn't dare separate them here either. (Plus I couldn't decide which one I like more.) I don't think I need to explain myself here. They are some of the best characters throughout the Star Wars saga, and never fail to amuse and entertain, even then the humans (and the Gungans...) do. Their "dialogues" are always great, even though the other one doesn't even speak. Now I'll let myself go crazy with these quotes... 

"I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me."
"Beep!"
"Of course I've looked better."

  
"Just you reconsider playing that message for him!"
"Beep?"
"No, I don't think he likes you at all."
"Beep?"
"No, I don't like you either."

 

"R2, why did you have to be so brave?"
 

"For a mechanic, you seem to do an incessant amount of thinking."

"I beg your pardon, but what do you mean, 'naked?'"
"Beep!" 
"My parts are showing? Oh, my goodness, oh!"

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (2009)

Directed by Terry Gilliam. Starring Heath Ledger, Christopher Plummer, Lily Cole & Johnny Depp, Jude Law, Colin Farrell.

Long story short: (... This is really difficult!) Doctor Parnassus likes to gamble with the Devil, literally. One of the deals he's made is to give his child to the Devil when they turn 16. His daughter Valentina is approaching that age, and Parnassus is running out of both time and ideas. Maybe one more deal will help him out of the mess? Then a mysterious stranger turns up and offers a helping hand. Oh, and then there's this mirror that takes you to an imaginary world where you have to make a choice.

The name Terry Gilliam guarantees something out of ordinary. I was actually afraid that it would be TOO out of ordinary, meaning just plain weird. Other Gilliam films I've seen include Twelve Monkeys (pretty good!), Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (never really got this one), The Brothers Grimm (I remember kind of liking it) and Brazil (talk about TOO weird... Damn it was confusing!). Plus some Monty Pythons. I was almost relieved when I realized I was actually able to follow the plot and I knew what was happening (almost) all the time! Of course there were a few wtf moments, like I'm not entirely sure what that ending was all about. Oh well.

Let's take a look at the cast, then, shall we! First, of course, Heath Ledger. For a while I couldn't stop wondering things like "which one was the last scene he ever shot" and "this scene must have been shot after his death, they must all feel so terrible", but luckily most of the time I was able to concentrate on the film itself. Heath was good (however, not quite like Joker or Ennis Delmar) and the character of Tony fitted him quite well. I somehow trusted Tony all the time, despite all the signs of a suspicious past, and I wanted him to be good in the end. I guess it's the charming way Heath Ledger played the character.


Christopher Plummer was excellent as the ancient and mysterious Doctor. I liked Lily Cole, too. Verne Troyer as Percy was just pure gold, with his sarcastic attitude. ("Percy, what would I do without you?" "Get a midget.") (Verne always reminds me of the British Celebrity Big Brother. I remember watching an episode, in which they had a chili eating challenge. Because of his small size, the chilis of course affected him more than the others, but the poor man ate them all anyway.) Who really won me over was Anton, played by Andrew Garfield. I was rooting for him all the time! A sweet boy, totally had my sympathies. For some reason Tom Waits's Devil left me a bit cold. He just wasn't, well, devilish enough for me. I liked the short appearance of Peter Stormare!

Then the three Imaginary Tonys, played by, as you all know, Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell. I couldn't help wondering how different the film would've been, had Ledger finnished shooting all of his scenes, but I guess that's beside the point. It worked well this way, too. All of the Imaginary Tonys did well, and I happen to like all three actors, but the best one had to be Johnny Depp. He had the least screen time, but gosh, I don't know, maybe it's just his unbeatable charisma. No wonder us ladies just adore him. Man-wise, this was a very good film.


AND in other ways, too! I'm not even getting started about the visual part, but hey, Terry Gilliam has one hell of an imagination. The scene with Jude Law's Tony in the clouds, wow. And that's just one example. Quite stunning indeed. I liked the contrast between the Imaginarium and the real world, which is so modern and so, well, ordinary. It was almost weird to see supermarkets and night clubs in a film like this. But I liked it!

What else what else what else...? Well. This film (the title is so long, I try to avoid writing it. Of course, writing this, I would have written it at least three times already. Sigh.) was a positive surprise for me, because I expected something way more over the top. This is definitely not a film for everyone. But I enjoyed it.

In the beginning of the end credits there was a text: A Film from Heath Ledger & Friends. I thought is was a nice salute. This is what Gilliam says in the DVD, I quote this from IMDb: "The loss of Heath Ledger was such a blow that it was a kind of a test of everybody involved in this film. Whether, in these kinds of incredibly difficult circumstances, we could continue and make a film worthy of Heath's last movie. And I think because of so many people, so many people who loved him, respected him, we pulled it off. It's also why I couldn't put a credit that was contractual on the film. And the contractual credit was, 'A film by Terrry Gilliam.' And I couldn't do that. I just didn't think that was right. And so one night, the cast and some of the crew were all gathered in Vancouver, toasting Heath, and saying, 'What are we gonna do? What are we gonna call it?' And we all agreed to call it, 'A film from Heath Ledger & Friends.' And I think it's truly the honest, accurate, and right credit. Forget contracts, for once let the truth speak."

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus (there, I did it!) was a bit of a mess at times, but I'm glad I watched it.

"Do you dream? Or should I say... can you put a price on your dreams?"