Anna Karenina (2012) / appreciation for Aaron Taylor-Johnson's mustache

"You can't ask why about love."

I'm being very honest with the title there. I really am not going to talk about the movie Anna Karenina that much. I'm just mostly going to talk about Aaron Taylor-Johnson's mustache. I wish I was kidding.

Anna Karenina was very much what I expected it to be. It was quite pleasant to watch, not just because of the certain mustache, but also because of the beautiful sets and the cinematography and the costumes. Joe Wright has directed many films that I have enjoyed watching, first and foremost Atonement, which is one of my favorite films of all time, and which also made me fall irrevocably in love with James McAvoy. And which I haven't seen in a few years, actually! Gee, I need to fix that. And see if it's still favorite material.

I am one of those people who have always liked Keira Knightley. Admittedly, most of my positive sentiments for her derive from Atonement (and that gorgeous green dress!), but I've enjoyed her other performances, too. If nothing else, she can definitely pull of a sophisticated, 18th/19th century aristocrat lady.  By the way, the make-up department should get an Oscar for making Jude Law look so unattractive. That takes some skill, yo!

I find it amusing that Matthew Macfayden has been demoted from being Keira Knightley's love interest to being her brother. Ouch! The years have not been as kind to Mr. Darcy as they have been to Elizabeth Bennet. (Macfayden is eleven years Knightley's senior, though, so it's only fair that he retires from romantic leading roles earlier than her.) I liked his character, though. Comic relief is always likable.

The film was a tad too long, and at times felt very aimless. I'm not sure about the necessity of some of the subplots. Like I'm not sure whether I liked the way they used the stage as a device in telling the story. It felt strange, and confusing in the beginning.

The romance of Anna Karenina and Count Vronsky is the heart of the story, so I guess it is the thing that has to be blamed for the film leaving my mind un-blown. I mean, of course I find the premise completely believable: Bring me Aaron Taylor-Johnson wearing that mustache and the hair and the uniform, and have him shoot a few of those seductive glances at me, and I'll leave my imaginary husband before you can say, "It's ironic that Jude Law plays the decent, saint-like husband who gets cheated on by his wife who falls for someone young and good-looking".

Anyway. What I most enjoyed about the film was the beginning: when they brought in Aaron T-J (damn you, dude, for getting married and changing your last name into something so long and troublesome to type) and painted the picture about what a charmer and a heart-breaker he is, and then had him and Keira exchange some of those lingering looks loaded with sexual tension, and showed him kissing hands in intense and intimate close-ups. Ooooh. Yeah, after that no member of the audience can blame Anna Karenina for ruining her life for this young hunk of a man.

Let's review:

The best things about Anna Karenina, pt. 1: The smoking hot glances full of pure sex and seduction.

The best things about Anna Karenina, pt. 2: The super hot close-ups of kissing of hands.

Unfortunately, after the hand-kissing and the sex-glancing have worked their magic, and Anna and Vronsky fall in love so swiftly and randomly during one dance that you think you're watching a Disney animation, my interest and hopes for the film drop significantly, not to to be raised again.

Not even letting us witness the two of them kissing, more passionately and more up close than any of us in the audience feel comfortable watching, could revive the excited feelings I felt in the beginning. Because, in the end, I felt we didn't get to see enough layers in the characters. We see they are both very attractive, but we don't really get why that attraction turned into love. But, well, you can't ask why about love, you know. Still, I wanted to go a little deeper. I didn't end up caring about the characters too much.

What I did care about, however, was Aaron Taylor-Johnson's mustache. It's weird. One should not look good in a mustache. Who really wears a mustache? Except for Charlie Chaplin and Hitler, and only one of them looks good wearing it. A mustache and a head full of fake blond curls is not the easiest combination to rock, especially if you are obligated to charm all of Earth's female population while doing it. So, two thumbs up for Aaron T-J for showing that mustache can be the new sexy. We can only hope he'll adapt that look to the Kick-Ass sequel, too. Really, honestly, seriously: Not many young men could pull of that look.

The best things about Anna Karenina, pt. 3: The mustache.

I went to see Anna Karenina in the cinema of my childhood and teenage years, which was so nice, because it had been ages since the last time I went there. The audience consisted mostly of high school kids, who had come to see the film as a class assignment. Me and and my friend felt old, and oddly envious of the lucky 16-year-olds, for having such simple lives, and just hanging out at school, only dreaming about their future, instead of having to live it. Anyway, the teenagers giggled at certain parts that made them feel uncomfortable, and that made me feel uncomfortable. At times I didn't have an idea why they were bursting out laughing. Oh well. Perhaps you can't ask why about unintentional comedy, either.

Then I came to think that had they made the Star Wars prequels ten years later, Aaron Johnson (or Taylor-Johnson, whatever) could have been the perfect Anakin Skywalker that Hayden Christensen was never quite able to be. He actually might have made some of the awkward romance scenes work, too, with a few of those Glances of Seduction. Might have. Just something I hope to have a detailed, vivid, lengthy dream about tonight.

Hmm.

I start writing these things, thinking I have hardly anything to say, because the film didn't have much of an impact on me, but then I end up writing a post, comparable to a Tolstoy classic in length. Oh, the power of a good mustache. I'll finish by quoting the actual novel, and maybe thus fool you into thinking that this has been a very intelligent and sophisticated post, indeed.

He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun, yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking.

~ Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina

Nostalgia

In the past couple of days (that can mean two days or two weeks or more, however you want to see it) I've had way too much free time (meaning I have hardly any lectures but SHOULD be doing IMMENSE amounts of independent study), so I've found myself making some dips in the nostalgic pool of my past passions and addictions. There's been the usual, more recent stuff like The Hunger Games and Klaine, but I also enjoyed some Chaplin comedy again the other day, and really feel like I need a fix of River Phoenix, too. And all this Episode VII talk makes me want to put on another 6-movie marathon, because it's been way too long.

Today I made the fateful mistake and was silly enough to read one of my posts from the early summer of 2010. That time was important in my fangirling life in the sense that Lost ended in May, and I was left nursing a hole bigger and more aching than no other fictional work has ever left in me (except for the Harry Potter books, maybe). This means that I wrote a lot about Lost. And now I read one of those post. And you know, if I give Lost my little finger, it'll soon have my whole hand. Both hands. And feet, and all my other limbs, too. I'm lucky I don't have the DVD's at my flat right now. Still, another Complete Lost Marahtron is an inevitability waiting to happen.

"Dear diary. Still on the bloody island. Today I swallowed a bug."

Good times!

In other news, I am currently occupying myself in catching up on my New Year Resolutions (I'm trying to tackle August at the moment, so there's still some way to go), being addicted to Breaking Bad (pun kind of intended) and feeling sorry for myself for being so broke that I'm not free to go to movies anytime I feel like it. Then again, I'm silly and easily persuaded, so the other day I agreed to go to see Paranormal Activity 4 with some friends. I've only seen the first one (and I'm pretty sure I was drunk at the time), and I haven't seen a horror movie in cinema since The Ring 2, which is for a reason. So, at the theatre I noticed that the new Bond was playing at the same time, and I started a passionate persuading process to convince my friends to go see that instead. We couldn't make up our minds, so at the ticket booth one round of rock-paper-scissors made the decision. I lost, and slept with the lights on the following night. And it wasn't even a particularly scary movie! I don't know how I slept after The Ring 2. Maybe I didn't.

Now I'm just waiting for The Hobbit, while hoping no one will say a word to me about Breaking Dawn Part 2, because I know I'd just say what the hell and throw that money to the wind.

I mentioned Breaking Bad; I should really write a post about it, it's a pretty cool show. Apparently I'm also writing my Bachelor's Thesis on it. Humanities, you know...

Also, I have a massive, Disney-related post on the way, which I've been working on for a year or something. It's the bomb! Although it has nothing to do with Breaking Bad. That Jesse Pinkman slang is just contagious.

EDIT// It's soon 1am and I've been sitting here for hours watching and listening to Disney videos on YouTube. This is going to be a long night...

Who would you be?

After a few week's break I though I'd accept the Movie Monday challenge again. Which film character would I like to be? Which fictional universe would I like to live in?

The first idea to pop into my head was very random and weird. And not nearly ambitious enough. I mean, come on, I have the whole universe on my hands; worlds and galaxies full of awesome and exciting milieus and fierce and admirable character executing daring and earth-shattering deeds. No way I'm going with something as lame as my first idea.

So, I naturally thought about Jedis. They're super über cool and can jump incredibly high and have most awesome weapons ever. But the thing is, their lives tend to end way too soon for my taste, or maybe they turn (almost) irrevocably evil just because that happens to be written in the stars or something. Too much drama for me, thank you very much.

Then I thought how wonderful it would be to be a part of the Weasley family and go to Hogwarts and learn magic and fight the Dark Forces. Only if I was a Weasley, it would be illegal for me to marry Ronald. Darn. Strike that.

'Oh but I've always wanted to live in a musical', I thought next. So how about High School Musical then? Bursting into song and dance in the middle of lunch, that would be the greatest thing ever. Maybe I'd get an amazing singing voice on the side, too? Honestly, though, that much positivity and smiling and happy endings and sugary clichees would make my teeth fall out in a day. So no. I decided to rule out every other Disney option too, because I'm always tempted to answer these challenges with Disney, and that's not very normal. (Oh wait! Does this mean I don't get to go with Pocahontas then? Damn!)

What else could it be, then? Superheroes? Other heroes? Dazzling and noble princesses? Revolutionaries who change the world? Mysterious loners or adventurous explorers from strange and exotic worlds or historic eras before ours? Nah. As nothing seemed to satisfy me, I thought 'Screw this', and concluded that I'm very boring, and thus don't long for galaxy-bending adventures or spine-chilling dangers. Not even in fun challenges that are meant for stretching your imagination and dreaming big. No, I guess in the end, real life with a spice is enough for me.

So I went with my first idea. Random and weird isn't necessarily bad.

Easy A is quite a surprising movie, as it's been stuck somewhere on the back of my head since I saw it some months ago. Comedies rarely do that for me. Thus it also happened to pop into my head when thinking about this challenge. I don't necessarily long to live in an American high school for the rest of my life, but the world of Easy A has pros too, and I will now concentrate on them.

Mainly, it's the insane wittiness that pretty much every person seems to possess. I'd love that. You'd just talk to people and say most genius things just like that. Imagine someone was messing with you, and you'd come up with the most awesome retort ever, but instead of proudly reciting the dialogue to everyone you know for the rest of the year, you wouldn't give another thought for your awesomeness, because those fantastic lines just keep pouring from your mouth all day, every day.

Also, as I would be Emma Stone's character Olive in this scenario, I would get a red hair (without having to be a Weasley and thus off Ronald's 'To Marry' list), and I wouldn't mind that. Nor the fact that she's inceribly and refreshingly mature, smart and self-confident for a protagonist of a high school comedy. I could use some of that. Also she has Stanley Tucci as a father. And Stanley Tucci would be a part of the deal, of course. Suck on that, wizards and Jedis, I have a Stanley Tucci father!

And maybe if I lived in the Easy A universe, someone would make funny montages of my boring weekends and actually make them look really cool and awesome, like this...



And for that, ladies and gentelmen, I will thus sacrifice the opportunity to jump unnaturally high, to be considered normal when breaking into a song when queueing at the supermarket, to keep saving the world on daily basis with awesome superpowers, and even to live in the Shire and spend the rest of my life eating and drinking and partying and daydreaming under fabulous trees and owning adorable feet and a terrific hair.

...Oh wait. I hadn't thought about the opportunity of being a Hobbit until now. Can I still change my mind about this and rewrite the whole post?

Darth Vader in love

He might be the most powerful sith in the galaxy and he might have more midichlorians than Master Yoda himself, but in love life, Lord Vader doesn't have it any easier than the rest of us.

My TOP 5 favourite male bonds in movies

Well, the title says it all, doesn't it? Here's a list of my favourite male twosomes (platonic bonds only)! Please, feel free to protest.

5. Gay Perry & Harry (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, 2005)

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is quite a hilarious movie. And most of the comedy emerges from the interaction between the characters of Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer. RDJ's small-time crook Harry babbles away in a pace that is quite a challenge to keep up with and Kilmer's bad ass gay detective Gay Perry rolls his eyes and tells Harry to shut the fuck up, you fucking idiot. For a little taste of that excellent team work, see the 'eight percent chance' scene, and the film's gag reel, too, because those two just crack me up.

"Look up "idiot" in the dictionary. You know what you'll find?"
"A picture of me?"
"No! The definition of the word idiot, which you fucking are!"

4. Gordie & Chris (Stand by Me, 1986)

These two might no crack me up much, but they certainly do melt my heart and make me wish I was a 12-year-old boy. (And just to be clear, that doesn't happen too often. (I mean the latter.)) Gordie and Chris, played by Wil Wheaton and River Phoenix, are so good buddies in such a profound and mature way that all you can do is envy them... and then melt away. So, whether it's about messing around with big boys' toys or opening up about your sorrows, they can always count on each other. As long as they are twelve, at least... Growing up sucks.

"I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?"

3. Holmes & Watson (Sherlock Holmes, 2009)

(Another RDJ, sorry.) Once I heard someone say that if RDJ had as good a chemistry with Rachel McAdams as he has with Jude Law, the film would've worked so much better. Haha, can't argue that. Holmes and Watson know each other very well, too well, even, and they constantly piss each other off, but still can fully rely on the other in a tough spot. And yeah, there's that slightly homoerotic vibe. That old-married-couple-ness is so much fun, really.

"You've never complained about my methods before."
"I'm not complaining. How am I complaining? When have do I ever complain about you practicing the violin at three in the morning, or your mess, your general lack of hygiene, or the fact that you steal my clothes?"

2. Merry & Pippin (The Lord of the Rings, 2001, 2002, 2003)

Of all the amazing friendships The Lord of the Rings has to offer, I chose this twosome without hesitation. Why? Because they have been friends like forever. Because they will be friends forever. Because if you separate them, they are just two lonely and lost and miserable halves. Because they are goofy and cute and adorable. Because Dominic Monaghan and Billy Boyd just click, and it shows. Because they appreciate the value of second breakfast. Okay?
 

"Are we lost?"

"No."

"I think we are."

"Shh. Gandalf's thinking."
"Merry?"

"What?"
"I'm hungry."

1. Anakin & Obi-Wan (Star Wars, 1999, 2002, 2005)

They shouldn't be number one. I mean, the way they potray this friendship in the films, and the way Ewan McGregor and Hayden Christensen act it, isn't always winner material. However, behind the occasional new-generation Star Wars horridness, there is a great and powerful story about a long, deep, strong bond that breaks apart under world-shattering circumstances. So that makes Anakin and Obi-Wan worth this ranking. (PS. Don't get me wrong, I like the prequels. Even I and II, kind of.)

"You were my brother, Anakin. I loved you."

HONOURABLE MENTIONS

Consolation prizes go to Woody & Buzz from Toy Story (1995, 1999, 2010) and Gerry/Daphne & Joe/Josephine from Some Like It Hot (1959). Sorry guys, you didn't quite make it. It was close, alright. I finalized the list before Toy Story 3, and afterwards I thought about cheating and making it a TOP 6, but I didn't. Maybe I should've. Still, Woody and Buzz are great (Woody and Andy, too!). And none of these guys would look so good on a dress as Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis did! Ewan McGregor, maybe? Anyway.

So... Who did I forget?

THE EMPIRE NEEDS YOU

First - I'm still very much alive and so is my blog, despite the lack of posts this week. My freetime has been mostly controlled by Lost (I need to get a move on, season 6 dvd box set is less than a month away...), The Hunger Games (they got me, too, finally), Pokémon (...yeah. I'll come back to this some time) and hangover some films I haven't really felt inspired writing about. Anyway.

Second - the IMDb Hit List always provides us with some pretty interesting links to articles and interviews and art work and such. This time I spotted these. Star Wars propaganda posters! These are cool. I remember seeing many real propaganda posters in the Imperial War Museum in London and it's easy to see the resemblence. Here's two of my favourites. (I think it's been too long since my last SW marathon... I just have too many marathons waiting to be on my schedule.)

My TOP 5 favourite (nice) robots

Yesterday's Moon rewatch inspired me to do this list. These are five of my favourite robots! ... This was actually an easy one, mostly because I wouldn't call myself a sci-fi expert, and these five were pretty much the only likable ones I came up with. I didn't want Schwarzenegger on my list - with all due respect of course, Mr Governor! I'm not very much into ruthless killing machines, so I'll leave Optimus Prime and co. out of my list, too. Call me a sissy, but I like my robots nice and sympathetic! Or just handsome.

5. Gigolo Joe (Artificial Intelligence: AI)

I admit, it's been a while since I saw Spielberg's futuristic sci-fi fairytale, but as it popped into my mind when making this list, I began to plan a rewatch. I was quite young when I saw AI, and it'd be interesting to see how I like it now. Jude Law's Gigolo Joe looks like Barbie's Ken in the picture indeed is what the name suggests: a lover robot. I wanted to include him on my list, because he is handsome there is something very tragic about this film and yet it is fascinating and same goes with the character. I think the quotes summarize it better that I can say:

"We are the guiltless pleasures of the lonely human being. You won't get us pregnant or have us to supper with mommy and daddy. We work under you, we work on you and we work for you. Man made us better at what we do than was ever humanly possible."

"They hate us, you know... The humans. They'll stop at nothing."

4. Marvin (The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy)

Marvin is very depressed. He's stuck with a bunch of idiots, and he can't put his enormous brain into action. There is really nothing that could cheer him up. After all, he's programmed to be depressed, the poor robot! Voiced by the wonderfully smooth Alan Rickman in the 2005 version of Douglas Adams' hilarious sci-fi adventure novel, he is the bright spot (no pun intended) of the otherwise mediocre interpretation. (Yeah, it has a good cast - including Sam Rockwell - but still. Nah.) Marvin is unintentionally hilarious, sarcastic and melodramatic, and Alan Rickman is just great... Who knew depression can be so much fun?

"I think you ought to know I'm feeling very depressed."
"Well, we have something that may take your mind off it."
"It won't work, I have an exceptionally large mind."

"I've been talking to the ship's computer."
"And?"
"It hates me."


"Life? Don't talk to me about life!"

3. GERTY (Moon)

GERTY is the only one keeping company to Sam Rockwell in his one man show Moon. GERTY is programmed to help and take care of Sam and that's what he does, whatever it takes. What I like about GERTY the most is Kevin Spacey's soothing voice and the smiley face icons.

"I'm here to keep you safe, Sam. I want to help you."

"Sam, get some sleep. You're very tired."

2. Wall-E (Wall-E)

Wall-E isn't just a sidekick, a supporting character or a comic relief. He's the star of his own (fantastic!) film. Disney/Pixar's animators have really done a great job creating this little robot - he doesn't talk much, but we know how he's feeling, all the time.Wall-E is disarmingly cute and adorable, in a way that no machine has even been before or after. An honorable mention to his badass love interest EVE (when has love between artificial things ever been so real?) and MO, who's just funny ("Foreign contaminent. Foreign contaminent.").

"EEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEE!"

1. R2-D2 & C-3PO (Star Wars)

"I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations. And this is my counterpart R2-D2." This is a legendary pair and the only option for number one. They work best together, so I didn't dare separate them here either. (Plus I couldn't decide which one I like more.) I don't think I need to explain myself here. They are some of the best characters throughout the Star Wars saga, and never fail to amuse and entertain, even then the humans (and the Gungans...) do. Their "dialogues" are always great, even though the other one doesn't even speak. Now I'll let myself go crazy with these quotes... 

"I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me."
"Beep!"
"Of course I've looked better."

  
"Just you reconsider playing that message for him!"
"Beep?"
"No, I don't think he likes you at all."
"Beep?"
"No, I don't like you either."

 

"R2, why did you have to be so brave?"
 

"For a mechanic, you seem to do an incessant amount of thinking."

"I beg your pardon, but what do you mean, 'naked?'"
"Beep!" 
"My parts are showing? Oh, my goodness, oh!"

A few funny/"funny" links...

Excuse me for my absence of two days, I've been trying my best to be a good student and apparently I have been. I'm awfully tired today, so that's a good sign, right? Oh dear. Thank god the next Vappu is one year away. My problem is that I can't really concentrate on more than one thing at a time.

So, I haven't seen any movies in the last couple of days. The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus is waiting for me to watch it, or try to watch it without falling asleep. I'll have a go tonight! Or maybe tomorrow morning, just to be safe. I hate when I have to watch a movie in two parts.

Today I'd like to share a few links with you, mainly because I'm not able to form intelligent sentences today. And these links represent the kind of humor that is just perfect for days like this. That "ha ha ha" kind of humor, you know what I mean?

If All Movies Had Cell Phones

Sauron meets Single Ladies

The Everyday Life of Darth Vader

There. I'll see you tomorrow, when I'll hopefully be in a better shape! If we're very lucky my brain might actually work.

Brothers

Today I was meant to see The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, but they didn't have any in my nearest Makuuni. Shame, I need to go check again soon! I really want to see it, though I'm afraid I won't like it. Terry Gilliam can do very weird things, sometimes too weird (e.g. a film called Brazil...). But there are at least four reasons to see the film: Heath Ledger, Johnny Depp, Colin Farrell and Jude Law. Enough for me!

So, plan B was to watch this film that has been on my must see -list for quite a while now.

Brothers (2009)

Directed by Jim Sheridan. Starring Tobey Maguire, Natalie Portman, Jake Gyllenhaal.

Long story short: Captain Sam Cahill is captured by the enemy in Afganistan. Back home, his family is told that he has died. Sam's brother Tommy, who's just recently got out of prison, does his best to take care of Sam's wife Grace and his two daughters. Eventually Sam returns back home, but he's not himself anymore. He's messed up, paranoid, haunted by what he did, refusing to tell Grace what happened (and looking like a skeleton, I might add).

So. It's Spiderman, Padme Amidala and Jack Twist all together in this excellent drama about family and war. First I have to compliment the cast. That nerdy Peter Parker is all grown up, I've never seen Tobey Maguire like this before. He's excellent, and I'm a bit surprised this wasn't acknowledged in the Oscars. He's very greepy at times, but also well showing the love he has for his family. Natalie Portman then... Everytime I see her in other films than the Star Wars prequels, I can't help wondering what made her act so badly in those three. Because she really is more than able to channel emotions in a believable and touching way! What was that cheesy, corny, phony "Anakin, you're breaking my heart!" horidness?? My guess is, George Lucas, mostly. With all due respect, George, of course! I love Star Wars anyway. And finally, the wonderful lovely Jake Gyllenhaal with those eyelashes I can't get enough of! Ah. No, but seriously, I liked that he played a bit darker character this time, with a bit of an edge! Those tattoos looked good on him, but despite his bad boy image, he still had warmth in him. But well, no matter what he does, his performance in Brokeback Mountain will always be his best in my book. Can't beat Jack Fucking Twist.

The characters were all great, real and easy to like. I just loved those two little girls! And even Sam and Tommy's dad got some of my sympathies, although he was a bit of an a-hole. The plot was interesting, and I was gripped by it the whole time. I cried a bit, I laughed and smiled, I was shocked, I was nervous... The end came too soon, I wanted to know more. I don't know if that's a sign of a bad ending or a good movie (a bit of both, probably), but I felt too many things were left unfinnished. Despite that, a very good film. I can warmly recommend it to everyone.

"I don't know who said 'only the dead have seen the end of war'. I have seen the end of war. The question is: can I live again?"

I read that they are planning on doing another Ring movie - in 3D, of course, are there other options nowadays... Why am I already sick with this 3D phenomenon? (Maybe because it makes my eyes hurt. I'm afraid my last Harry Potter experiences will be ruined because of it.) What's wrong with 2D? Nothing. Sure, sometimes 3D works well, but come on. If they really are going to re-release Titanic in 3D (and I'm sure they will, James Cameron likes money a bit too damn much. It's a shame he did Titanic, otherwise I could dislike him without boundaries...), I of course have go and see it, because Titanic on a big screen just has to be experienced, but couldn't they release a good old 2D version too? Please? Pretty please? It would make more money, my dearest James!

Hmm. I believe I was talking about the Ring sequel. Although I believe it might be a prequel! Since they kind of eliminated the change of Samara returning in the second one... But well, they said they found a loophole. Great. Anyway, that sweet little girl crawling out of the tv and practically out of the screen too sounds pretty scary. No way I would see it in cinema. Or who knows.